The cruelty must stop: What is wrong with some of our women and their house helps?
By Fred Chukwuelobe
I don’t mind being called a misogynist or accused of generalising on this matter. Frankly, I think we have reached a point where somebody has to speak out loudly against the inhuman treatment some South East women mete out to their domestic servants. And while we are at it, we must also call out their husbands, particularly those who watch helplessly as their wives turn other people’s children into household slaves. Some of these men are either complicit or simply too weak to call their wives to order.
For quite some time now, stories of South East women who mercilessly maltreat their domestic servants have been making the rounds. The latest is the disturbing incident in Ogidi, Anambra State, where a woman allegedly beat her 10-year-old domestic servant so mercilessly that a neighbour had to intervene to rescue the child. Reports identified the girl as Chizoba Ifeanyi and the alleged perpetrator as her aunt, Mrs Adaobi Agbonta. The incident reportedly occurred because the little girl refused to sweep the house. Imagine that!
What manner of woman beats a ten-year-old child to that extent over an ordinary household chore? What exactly does she expect from a child of that age? And what would have happened if that neighbour had not intervened?
Unfortunately, this is not the first time we have heard such stories.
In July 2020, Nigerians were horrified by the story of 10-year-old Nneoma Nnadi in Enugu. Her employer, Ifeoma Ozougwu, was accused of inserting a six-inch nail into the child’s skull, using hot pressing irons on her body and subjecting her to other forms of torture. Her husband was also arrested in connection with the incident. It was one of those stories that made one wonder whether some people were actually human beings.
In May 2023, another case emerged from Nkpor, Anambra State, involving an eight-year-old house help who was allegedly brutally beaten by her employer, Chinyere Ifesinachi. The child reportedly sustained multiple injuries.
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Then there was the March 2018 case in Lagos involving a woman, Nkeiruka Ngwu, who was arrested for allegedly using a hot pressing iron and hot water on her 10-year-old house help, Chioma Samuel, a child reportedly brought from Abia State after the death of her father.
These are just some of the reported cases. And before anybody accuses me of deliberately picking on South East women, let me acknowledge that similar incidents have occurred in other parts of the country. In March 2026, PREMIUM TIMES reported the arrest of a woman in Cross River State over the alleged assault of her five-year-old niece, who was reportedly being used as a domestic helper. In Delta State, a woman was sentenced to two years’ imprisonment in 2020 for using a hot kitchen knife to disfigure the mouth of her nine-year-old housemaid.
I am not aware of any reliable national statistics establishing which ethnic group records the highest number of such abuses. But the frequency of disturbing stories involving women in our part of the country should worry us. We cannot continue pretending that nothing is happening.
Thank goodness I am Igbo of South East, so nobody should waste time accusing me of Igbophobia. I am talking about a problem that deserves to be confronted within our society. And I am certainly not suggesting that all South East women behave this way. Far from it. There are countless decent, compassionate and responsible South East women who treat their domestic workers with love and dignity. But those who engage in these atrocities must be called out.
What exactly is the matter with some of these women? Why are they so wicked to other people’s children?
These are children born by poor parents, just as their own children were born. Some have lost their parents. Others come from homes where their parents cannot afford to provide for them. They are sent to live with relatives or brought into households where they are expected to receive care, assistance and, in some cases, an opportunity to go to school. Instead, some end up living like slaves.
They are made to wake up before everybody else, cook, wash, clean, fetch water, look after babies and perform virtually every household chore. They eat last, sleep last and are often the first to be blamed whenever anything goes wrong. Some are fed with leftovers or denied food altogether for the slightest offence. Others are denied access to education and decent clothing.
Once you see some of these women and their children in an outing to events and even church services, you can easily identify the house help. The difference in their dressing alone tells a story. The madam’s children are beautifully dressed, while the little girl or boy accompanying them looks like somebody picked up from the street.
I recall seeing a woman who took her children to a fast-food restaurant. While the children sat comfortably at the table enjoying their lunch, their domestic servant sat somewhere nearby, clutching madam’s handbag and watching them eat. She was not even treated as someone who deserved to sit at the same table and enjoy a meal. I found the sight particularly disturbing.
I also recall a case in which a woman allegedly used a hot pressing iron on her domestic servant because the child drank a soft drink meant for her own children. A bottle of soft drink! Can you imagine burning another person’s child because she drank what your children were meant to drink?
What kind of wickedness is that?
Some of these women apparently believe that because they provide accommodation and food for their domestic servants, they have acquired ownership of their lives. They forget that these children have parents, feelings, dignity and rights. Even if their parents are dead, they remain human beings deserving of compassion.
And what is even more disturbing is that some of these women are regular churchgoers. They attend services, participate in church activities, make donations and sometimes occupy prominent positions in their religious organisations. On Sundays, they sing praises and pray fervently. But when they return home, the same hands that are raised in worship are used to beat and torment another person’s child. What manner of Christianity is that?
Then there are the husbands. I have a special word for them. Some of you need to grow a backbone. How can you sit in your living room, know that your wife is beating and maltreating a little child, and pretend that nothing is happening? Is the child not a human being? Does your responsibility to protect the vulnerable end because the person abusing the child happens to be your wife?
Marriage does not require you to surrender your conscience. If your wife is cruel to a domestic servant, call her to order. If she refuses to change, protect the child and involve the appropriate authorities. Do not become an accomplice simply because you want peace at home.
I also have a word for the relatives who send their children away to live with wealthy relations. Please, do not abandon your parental responsibilities simply because somebody has promised to take care of your child. Visit. Call. Ask questions. Find out what the child eats, where the child sleeps and whether the child is attending school. Do not wait until the child returns home with scars or ends up in a hospital before you realise that something has gone terribly wrong.
We must declare war on this practice
I believe it is time for South East sociocultural organisations, town unions, women organisations, civil society groups and religious institutions to take this matter seriously. It should no longer be treated as an ordinary domestic disagreement.
Where are our women organisations? Where are the church groups that organise meetings every week? Where are the Christian Mothers’ organisations? Where are the wives of our governors? Why should we wait until another child is nearly killed before everybody starts issuing statements?
The First Ladies of the South-East states should take up this challenge and champion a regional campaign against the abuse of domestic workers. Traditional rulers, presidents-general of town unions and community leaders should make child protection a regular subject of discussion in their communities.
Our governments must also wake up. The Child Rights Act and the corresponding state laws provide a legal framework for protecting children against abuse, exploitation and neglect. These laws must be enforced. Those found guilty of abusing children should face the full consequences of the law. We must stop the practice of settling serious cases of child abuse quietly within families or through some backdoor community arrangement.
If existing laws are inadequate, the state legislatures should strengthen them. There should also be proper regulation of domestic-worker recruitment, particularly where children are involved. No child should be handed over to an employer under an arrangement that leaves the child without protection or accountability.
Neighbours must also learn to intervene. If you hear a child screaming persistently or notice unexplained injuries, do not look the other way. Report the matter. You may be saving a child’s life.
I am particularly concerned that the behaviour of these women is beginning to cast an unnecessary shadow on other Igbo women who are decent, responsible and compassionate towards their domestic workers. That is unfair to the many women who treat their house helps as human beings, provide for their education and give them opportunities they might otherwise not have had.
But decent people must not remain silent while others behave like monsters. We must also stop pretending that every child brought into a home as a house help is necessarily enjoying some form of privilege. In some cases, what is happening is nothing short of exploitation. A child who is denied education, adequate food, decent accommodation and basic human dignity, while being compelled to work from morning till night, is not enjoying the benefits of living with a wealthy family. That child is being exploited.
Slavery ended centuries ago. It must not be surreptitiously reintroduced through the back door by women who believe that other people’s children are available for them to treat anyhow.
I have said my piece. It is time for our communities, governments, religious institutions and, particularly, the womenfolk to rise against this barbaric practice. We cannot continue to look away while vulnerable children are subjected to indignity and cruelty in the very homes where they should be safe.
A house help is not a slave. A poor child is not a second-class human being. And no amount of wealth, marriage or social status can excuse cruelty.
That is the message we must send, loudly and unequivocally.
Fred Chukwuelobe, fnipr, wrote from Lagos
