Sunday, November 17, 2024
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Home COLUMNISTS Friends who lift my spirit, head keep me going

Friends who lift my spirit, head keep me going

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I hope you have the kind of friends I have. Friends that go way back to high school and newer friends from the places I’ve lived in. I have not seen many of my closest friends in 30 years and lost touch with many of them. But after I was diagnosed with cancer I started to yearn for a chance to rekindle my friendship with each of them.. I long to tell you more of the different ways they have moved me to tears and fire up my will to live, especially when I get bad news form the doctors like I did last week.

 

At first I wanted to keep news of my diagnosis only within close family members and a few close friends from high school: Elizabeth, Ekero, Gladys, Mogbeyi, Hettie, Bridget, Yejide plus a few others.

 

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My sister, Odo, called Bridget to tell her about my diagnosis, because she has remained close to my family and she is battling cancer too. When Bridget called me I told her I long to hear from Elizabeth, Ekero and Gladys for starters. I told her I didn’t want the news to spread,

 

Bridget called Gladys in South Africa (actually, a country close by) and Gladys called Dr. Tosan and Rita in America and told them to visit me. Tosan and Rita were miffed but they obeyed Gladys’ order . “ Why did we have to hear from South Africa that you are sick, when we are right here,” they demanded to know when they showed up at my place a few days later. Tosan and Rita are the ones who called Dr. Francis, the much-beloved head of the North East branch of F.G.C Old student’s association. He showed up to assess me and my situation even before Tosan and Rita visited. Dr. Francis took time to meet with my aunty and get her input on how best I could be helped. He wanted to make sure my aunty did not feel disrespected by the association.

 

Gelekukuma, Aghogho, Shade, Fred visited with their own gifts. Seniors Chrisbo and Joyce (who came all the way from Massachusetts) visited also. They called or met with the people on the ground who were heling me. When I called Brother Biggs who was assigned the ministry of driving me to my hospital appointments ( by a nearby church I had supported during their Black History Month celebration) he said he was close by. Chrisbo and Joyce asked him to drop by. They thanked him profusely for his help and tried to give him some money for gas, but Brother Biggs refused to take the money. The seniors drove to my aunt’s store and also thanked her for housing me.

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My aunty has been effusive in her praise of my high school friends. She tells everybody, “This is a testimony. I’ve never seen anything like this before. They call, they visit, they bring everything. It pays to go to a good school.”

 

Bamidele, called from Atlanta on behalf of the entire Old Student association of North America. Bamidele gave my number to Okoronkwo who sounded so heart-broken about the news about me he just heard. Caroline called from Arizona a couple of times.

 

Before I knew it, they held a conference call open to all old students in the North East area. They decided they would support me in many ways. They raised funds, they took turns to visit me and bring food (cooked and fresh). They brought clothes I would wear when I recover (they want me to think positive), winter coats I needed right away and face towels, etc. They sent word out to F,G,C Warri old students everywhere. Soon I was getting calls from all over, with some starting with, “ I am so and so, I wonder if you remember me.” My response was often: Of course, I do. Soon my cheap StraightTalk phone crashed, maybe it could not keep up with the deluge of calls.

 

Support from friends in London picked up too. Do you remember Bennet? asked Elizabeth, my friend who mobilized the London network. Of course, I do, I said, as the image of him flashed in my mind. Another call started with: “This is Onoriode, do you remember me?” Said I, “Of course, I do.”. Onoriode was very smart, good in the subjects I struggled with —- math and chemistry and often helped me with my homework.

 

Muobo also called from London saying, I’m the one who gave Bridget Elizabeth’s number.”

 

I was so thrilled to hear from Elizabeth, who I will call my best friend from high school. She moved me to tears when she said, “The entire Iyamabo family, all 10 of us, plus our parents are solidly behind you.” Soon I was receiving calls from Iyamabos everywhere. Patience drove many hours with her husband to visit me, bearing all kinds of fresh foods and cooked food.

 

I later thanked Bridget for not respecting my wish for privacy. She said she understood my initial desire for privacy but having gone through the same experience she decided that my need for support trumps my need for privacy.

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