I have been married for 13 years. My wife and I have a loving relationship. One thing that has been threatening our union is my problem of being very easily stimulated. Erections happen very quickly during intercourse; leaving my wife frustrated and me apologetic. My lasting time is three to five minutes. I would like to know what my options are to help me last longer. Are there any drug solutions? I want to make my wife happy in the bedroom as I do out of the bedroom.
Thank you for your time.
Before starting any drugs, you may want to start with natural methods first. Controlling your anxiety or extreme excitement before or during sex might help. Try to plan what you want to do beforehand and explore foreplay. You can also try masturbating without lubrication. Then try masturbating with lubrication. After, you can probably masturbate with visual aids (adult magazines, then porn later). This gradually increases visual stimulation will help in controlling your urges to ejaculate and maintain erection longer. Once you have already managed to sustain an erection, you can try the start-stop method. Try to masturbate until the time you are about to ejaculate then stop and control the ejaculation by thinking of things that are not stimulating.
Other ways that can help are pelvic muscle exercises. Yoga will not only help reduce anxiety but will also decrease tension in the pelvic region. Kegel exercises are also helpful.
It has also been studied that the missionary position (man-on-top) adds more tension on the muscles and is associated more with premature ejaculation. Spooning (side-to-side), doggy position (rear entry, both on knees), and woman-on-top positions are more effective in prolonging the excitement phase and delaying the ejaculatory phase.
Desensitising creams and use of condoms may also help. There are medications, actually anti-depressants, that will delay the ejaculatory phase, but you need a doctor’s prescription for that.
