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Dame Ihedioha: Farewell to My Mother 

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My mother was a strict disciplinarian who ensured that the virtues of hard work, discipline and respect were inculcated in her children.

By Emeka Ihedioha

As my mother, Dame Dorothy Nsonma Ihedioha, begins her glorious journey to eternity, the reality is finally hitting home that she is no longer around with us. But her memories will linger on because, in good and bad times, she was always there for us. And speaking for myself, she was always there for me. In the 90 eventful years that mama sojourned on Mother Earth, what marked her out was a rare combination of strength, resilience and adorable love. Her wisdom illuminated our paths. She was zestful in words and action. Yet, Mama had her own challenges. But she never allowed them to define or defeat her. She was the epitome of uncommon strength and unwavering courage. 

While she was with us, Mama’s guiding philosophy rested on the admonition: listen to your intuition and trust your gut instinct. With this guardianship, she ensured that the vacuum that her exit would create in my life was readily filled. The life of intuitiveness and bravery which she bequeathed to me is now anchored in my happy and fulfilled marital life. 

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My mother was a strict disciplinarian who ensured that the virtues of hard work, discipline and respect were inculcated in her children. It was therefore little wonder that as I grew up, I was always conscious of how disappointed Mama would feel if I took the wrong turn. Mama inspired me to live by the ideals of love and service to others. And that remains the guiding principles in the choices I make in both my personal and public life.  

Even though Mama is on her journey home, I am filled with utmost comfort for the simple reason that she led a very fulfilling life. And she finished strong. In his play “King Lear”, William Shakespeare had written this immortal line: “Men must endure their going hence, even as their coming hither: Ripeness is all”. The message here is that it is all-important to await the proper time for death, as fruit falls from the tree only when ripe. For us, the Ihediohas, Mama at 90 years of age was ripe through and through, even as we wished she stayed with us longer. 

Meanwhile, the longevity Mama enjoyed was no happenstance. Even though she had a genetic tendency for old age, what she had going for her was her well-ordered life of honour and discipline. She shunned frivolity in whatever guise. For those of us she left behind, we stand challenged to aspire to the towering height she attained.  

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Although her loving husband, my father of blessed memory, Nze BMG Ihedioha, died 28 years ago, Mama trudged on like a spartan, guiding and guarding the family with her wisdom, love and gracefulness. Her life bears eloquent testimony to the difference a protective and caring mother can make in the lives of her children. She taught us the value of perseverance, reminding us that no obstacle is insurmountable and that every setback presents an opportunity for growth. She demonstrated, through her accomplishments, that a life well-lived is not measured by its length but by its depth. Mama was guided in the main by a remarkable sense of trust in God’s faithfulness. 

As my mother takes final steps into eternity, we take solace in the overwhelming outpouring of tributes from far and wide. The affection and love that have come our way after her passage have helped to relieve the pain. And we owe that to her too. Mama deepened the bedrock of all our relationships. It is a testament to the remarkable woman she was that she transcended all artificial boundaries that have held our country back. To many of our friends, she was their mother too. Her love, kindness, and grace knew no bounds and her legacy will continue to inspire and touch hearts for generations to come.  

However, nobody lives forever. The wisdom of King Solomon encapsulates the delicate balance between life and death. “To everything, there is a season, and a time to every purpose under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die,” he reminded us in the Biblical Book of Proverbs. We are consoled by the knowledge that both are integral parts of the human journey and must be approached with reverence and purpose. 

Ada Zion, as she was fondly called, touched the lives of all who came across her in immeasurable ways. Her life is worthy of emulation, and her good deeds will forever remain etched in our hearts.  

Mama, as we bid you farewell, we undertake to carry the echo of your resounding laughter, the steadfastness of your faith and the aggregation of your excellent virtue, knowing your spirit will forever reside within us, guiding us and reminding us of who we are until we meet again. 

Sleep in peace, the Ihedioha jewel, until we meet again to part no more.

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