The Bible begins and ends with a marriage.
It begins with the account of the marriage of Adam and Eve and ends with the marriage of the church (the bride) to Christ (the heavenly Bridegroom).
In this article, which uses the Biblical account of the marriage of Uriah and Bathsheba as a pilot, the oldest social institution comes under deep scrutiny and introspection.
The book of 2 Samuel 11:1-13 tells us of a very moving and life-touching story. It is the story of the relationship between king David and Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam who was, till that time, married to Uriah, the Hittite. A lot has been said by many preachers and Bible scholars about this story from the perspective of David.
A lot of them look at it from the perspective of success and temptation becoming a trap for leadership failure. A few other people have looked at the story from the point of view of Bathsheba i.e. the effect of a very attractive and compelling lady on a sexually-active leader.
The perspective from which I want to study this story at this point in time is, however, from the point for view of an incompetent marriage and the effect it could have on the lives of the various people involved.
The summary of the story is that at a time kings went to the battle, David sent his men and stayed back at home because he had now become a very successful king.
However, physically and spiritually, he was in the wrong place at the wrong time. As such events usually unfold, he saw a beautiful lady having her bath. He lusted after her, sent for her and had an inappropriate relationship with her, regardless of the fact that she was married to one of his soldiers who was at that time busy at battle for him.
A lot of people have blamed David for that relationship. But I beg to say that he had a very willing partner in the person of Bathsheba. It did not take David too long to persuade Bathsheba to lie with him.
The Bible says in 2 Sam 11:4 that it was possible for David to lie with Bathsheba because she was prepared, i.e. the Bible says she was cleansed from her impurity. Not only was she prepared, but there is no record of her offering any resistance to David.
The problem started when the result of that one-night stand or perhaps a continuous relationship (the Bible is not clear on this) ended up in a pregnancy and Bathsheba sent a message to David to let him know that she was with child.
David’s reaction was to try and cover up his misdeed by setting up Uriah (Bathsheba’s husband) to be killed in the battlefront and thereafter taking Bathsheba as wife. This was after he had tried to force Uriah to have his wife at that same period, so that it would look like Uriah actually impregnated Bathsheba, to no avail.
It was a grievous sin against a fellow man and great cruelty in the eyes of God.
The question, however, is what was Bathsheba herself thinking about? What was the problem she was having with Uriah? What kind of marriage or relationship did Mr and Mrs Uriah have?
A lot of people, especially ladies, look forward to marriage and think that once they marry, all their problems would be solved.
Statistics have it that a lot of marriages have problems. As a matter of fact, in America, the divorce rate is about 55 per cent. A lot of other couples are living like strangers, sleeping in different rooms, following very different routines. Some couples go for as long as nine months without any sexual interaction. Some don’t even talk for weeks.
A lot of people suddenly marry and find out that they have nothing in common. Many a couple have regretted the day of their marriage and many are having extra-marital affairs.
A long time ago, there was a gentleman who could swear that his wife was totally faithful to him. All he knew was that he would take her from time to time to a certain house to borrow video tapes.
She would go into the house, select the video, and be back in the car in all of 10 or 15 minutes. What the man did not know was that the house belonged to the wife’s boyfriend and that it did not take longer than 10 to 15 minutes to have a quick sexual affair.
I am also told of the story of another man who, in his last will and testament, left behind for his wife a broom stick and a potty, because he claimed that his wife had had an extra marital affair resulting in the birth of a child that was not biologically his own, though the child bore his name and he had been responsible for looking after the child form birth.
A lot of marriages have major problems, and what you find a lot of times are couples just managing to live together in mutual tolerance. Uriah and Bathsheba’s was no exception; they were having their own problems.
How do I know Uriah and Bathsheba were having problems?
The first reason is the ease with which Bathsheba had an affair. The second reason is the fact that Uriah was reluctant to go home when David withdrew him from the battle field, to ‘have a good time’ with his family.
• Continues in next edition.