Accountability. Noun. The quality or state of being accountable; an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility for one’s actions.
At the funeral of a friend last week, after I had retired with my late friend’s daughter to her private quarters, a couple walked in and I was struck by the fact that the air around them seemed particularly heavy. Yes indeed, we were all weighed down by the demise of the departed at an age considered premature, for she was less than 60 years old; but this couple seemed to be burdened by a greater weight than the common grief which united all who were present on that occasion. After their departure I was informed that those poor parents had just lost their son, a thirty-something year old young man. He had simply slumped – and was pronounced dead on arrival at the hospital. He was overweight and suffered from high blood pressure.
I have frequently thought, whenever I have seen or heard of similar instances where an individual has engaged in some action which put their life at risk, that the family members and close friends have been treated with lack of consideration. How we take our loved ones for granted! We believe we are free to live our lives as we please, over-eating, over-drinking and engaging in a lifestyle which may result in serious health problems like kidney failure, obesity, hypertension or lung cancer, and we give no thought to the trouble to which we would put our loved ones when the effects of our actions finally catch up with us!
Even as these lines are being written, one can imagine how many people are languishing in our hospitals, not because they are on admission but because they have to stay with their wives, husbands, sons, daughters or even friends who are there receiving treatment for diseases brought on by their lifestyles; that is, diseases which could have been completely avoided. Why do we inflict untold hardship on the very people we claim to love best?
Considering this issue has led me to think that it might be useful for families to draw up an “Accountability Pact” which would be subscribed to by every member. The idea of formally promoting mutual accountability was first introduced to me by a teacher I had at the Haggai Institute in Hawaii several years ago. He informed the class that he and a few of his friends had entered into a pact of mutual accountability; they had each agreed to live their lives by the highest standards of moral uprightness and integrity, and had accepted that each of them had the right to directly challenge any one who was found to fall short of this commitment. He equally gave us the statement of their commitment to a life of simplicity. Ever since, my appreciation of the need for such a practice has greatly increased.
What would a Family Accountability Pact look like? It does not have to be long or complicated in any way. A simple statement would do, along the following lines, for example: “I,…………, being a member of the …………. family, hereby commit myself to embracing a healthy lifestyle which would promote my total wellbeing. I will not engage in any activity which could jeopardise my health and consequently inflict unnecessary hardship upon my loved ones.” Of course, there would need to be agreement among the family members regarding the nature of activities – which kind promotes wellness, for example, and which kind jeopardises health? Anyhow, if such a pact were to bind family members, the world would sure be a better place!
From the foregoing, it is evident that what is being advocated goes beyond mere accountability, in the sense of simply accepting responsibility for one’s actions, which most dictionary definitions tend to emphasize. It is not sufficient, after things have gone wrong, to simply take responsibility for what has happened, as the former head of one of our tertiary institutions loved to do. True, not a few people find even this elementary level of accountability problematic; they fail to comprehend or accept the responsibility which their position carries and instead constantly look for enemies or other “misguided individuals” upon whom they would lay the blame for their action or inaction. This kind of behaviour is worthy only of children and is truly pathetic to behold in grown people.
We are saying, in effect, that owning up after the fact is simply not good enough. Of what comfort is it to parents who have just lost their son that the young man took responsibility that it was his over-indulgence with regard to food and drink which resulted in his health problems? And as for accountability in governance, let us not even begin to delve into that area! Does it make sense for a leader to have taken actions which result in the impoverishment or even death of the majority of a nation’s citizens, only for him or her to glibly “accept responsibility” for what has happened? Accountability needs to be brought to the fore – before the fact. That is, my being accountable to you has to have such a grip on me that it prevents me from engaging in actions which would cause you harm or hardship. That is why the idea of a pact – a true and honest one – is important.