A civil rights women organisation, The Project Alert, in conjunction with Zonta Club of Lagos 1 recently organised a roundtable discussion on male involvement in the elimination of violence against women and girls. Senior Correspondent, JUDE KENNETH, reports.
The call for enlistment of men in the struggle was made during roundtable discussions organised in Lagos recently by the organisations.
The discussion, which centred mainly on male involvement and various methods that should be adopted in the elimination of violence against women and girls, was anchored by the executive director of Project Alert Dr. Josephine Effah-Chukwuma.
Discussions
In the lead discussion on male involvement, Praise Fowowe opined that men should be involved in eliminating violence against women and girls by creating a structure that could let people know how to respond, adding that campaign against women and girl violence should be extended from the family to schools, churches, organisations and associations.
According to him, naturally, everybody has an idea, but the idea could be wrong or right, depending on the conception.
Wrong idea, he added, produces wrong thoughts which in turn produce wrong concepts and finally wrong vision, thus culminating into error. But life is about good idea which produces good thoughts, good concepts and good vision.
“We can only understand life to the extent of how correct our concept is,” he said.
Fowowe defined woman as a “female version of man, a visible image of God, a dominion spirit in feminine body, a nurturer and deliverer of the future, a companion and helpmeet and the most powerful force on earth”. He disagreed with the conception that women are the weaker vessel, saying that at the root of every violence against women and girls is a non-discovery of the true identity of a woman.
He argued that at the formation of human, sperm and ovary joined, adding that none can form human without the other and, therefore, neither the sperm nor the ovary is stronger or weaker than the other.
Challenging everyman to rise and make commitment to become true bridegroom whose core role is to groom the lady/woman and set her free to become the best she can ever be, Fowowe stressed that no woman deserves to die any longer in the hands of the killer. He added that it is high time men rose and freed that lady/woman trapped behind the prison of religion, culture and tradition.
In his contribution during the discussion, J. Kalejaiye Randle stressed the need for counselling to would-be couples, pointing out that churches should be involved. He expressed the need to interpret the nature of the counselling, positing that sex, money and extended family mostly affect marriages.
In his presentation, a discussant, Awoke Ogbo of Giantthoughts International Limited, said the problem of violence against women and girls is systemic, adding that the problem cannot be solved in isolation.
According to him, the problem stems from collapse of values such as money worship, objectification of women, devaluation of male quality, dysfunctional family system and dysfunctional support communities in addition to prejudicial attitudes. In proffering solution to the problem, he said there is serious need to re-engineer our values in terms of behaviour and positive attitude formation in areas of spirituality, gender, family, money and community.
Ogbo posited that women are having problems because “men are no longer men”.
“While we are empowering young girls to take up challenges of our time, our young boys are not bracing up with the challenges or come out a successful man,” Ogbo expressed.
He stressed the importance of carrying the campaign down to the grassroots, advising that the instant forum should be organised in other suburbs, so that all concerned should know about it.
Divisional Police Officer (DPO) in charge of Oke-Odo, CSP Monday Agbonika, highlighted the duties of the police, which is to enforce law and ensure that rights of people are protected. He said the police are in partnership with civil groups and have set up family support units for the purpose of treating or attending to gender-based violence victims in Lagos State. There is also the family courts to deal with issues such as broken marriages and battering of women.
A lot is being done by the police, said Agbonika, to ensure gender protection and issues relating to women/girl violence such as rape, battering and other forms of injustice. He however said that the police have challenges in enforcing some of the laws.
Ben Odeh, a lawyer and head, Legal Unit of Project Alert, while sharing the experience of male lawyers who represent or appear for women, said though there is the Domestic Violence Law in force, challenges abound in the implementation of the law. He pointed out the issue of filing matters in court as a big problem and urged women rights organisations to focus on the issue. Until recently, according to him, some judges did not know about the Domestic Violence Law.
In his contribution, another lawyer, Nelson Ekoh, who prosecuted the late Titilayo Arowolo’s case, advised couples to be careful and know themselves better before going into marriage, stating that men should see themselves as shock absorbers in their marriages.
“As men, we should be able to endure, but if not, let the marriage end,” he advised. “We must therefore unite to end Gender Based Violence (GBV). Men must speak out against GBV and initiate/participate in activities to sensitise the public, render support services to survivors and ensure that perpetrators are brought to book.”
Way forward – Enlistment of men
After brainstorming on violence against women and girls, and how men could be involved in its eradication, the discussants agreed on the following terms: chief judges should ensure strict implementation of the Domestic Violence law; the campaign should be carried by men to churches, mosques by individuals and unions, through media such as television programmes, write-ups/articles; men should join to fight the battle.
The discussants agreed that there should be massive education and involvement of boys and men.
Schools, professional bodies and associations such as Nigeria Union of Teachers (NUT) Nigerian Bar Association (NBA), Nigeria Union of Journalists (NUJ) and others should be reached.
Musicians/artistes should be discouraged from using nude or half-naked young girls to showcase or popularise their music or movies. Family men/fathers should discourage their children from watching and listening to nude, violent and immoral movies and music.
Husbands must desist from beating their wives, scolding or abusing them, especially in the presence of their children. The campaign should be carried to the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC) and sensitise the members.
Lectures on violence against women is suggested to be included in the school curricula and town unions, and alumni associations’ activities.
It was also agreed at the forum that Zonta Club and Project Alert, with some men stakeholders, should arrange a visit to the Chief Judge of Lagos State to discuss the issues of waiver for filing fees by women and implementation of Domestic Violence Law.
It was also agreed that there should be sensitisation of the police, formation of faith-based advocacy, targeting churches. Using of pastors as counsellors and sensitisation of parents, especially men through market associations, motor parks, and drinking joints. The social media was also agreed for usage to mobilise men and professional bodies.